a dream i had this morning...

Dream July 13

Driving around like CIA with Arab informant / a square park like in El Salvador / one side of street / waited and watched; standing in a field between two houses next to chicken coops the wind was blowing hard and watching birds trying to survive the elements there was a white dove that i had been watching it was sitting on a cloud and resting and seemed kinda sad; hawks where swooping down.

There was a green steep hill side a high ridge knife back and a highway bridge with a train falling just slow enough so people could think about their lives just before they died. Dropped-off left guy in the car glad to get rid of him, i'm wearing a suit at the park i get out of the car leave arab informant behind; girl colleague says she would rather go to that other bar across the street but didn't bring her "butch" clothes. I try not to slip on the grass hill i'm waring dress shoes...we had passed a small reservoir with a boat ramp i can feel the fish resting - back to park, we pause as we walk across park and i tune my radio to this chill radio station somewhat meditative....

Ifwhen - Hear Less (from split 12" with Dälek)

http://www.kfjc.org/music/playlist.php?i=38493

Ifwhen - Hear Less (from split 12" with Dälek)

thanks for the video Ifwhen

July 12, 2011

I was sitting in a library a classroom and my name was called out…because I had a book that a girl wanted, so that it could be signed, it was a book buy Guy and he was there actually there and he was going to sign this book. He was so casual looked to be in his mid 40’s sitting where the librarian usually sits; I stared for a moment remembering that I was dreaming but it continued on but weirder of course. My friend started talking to him going on and on stupid questions but I’m not sure what I would have asked and I waited patiently listening; how a girl very depressed had come to him with her portfolio and he had told her that you need a very clear concept etc. he was sympathetic but you could tell a little impatient, he had been willing to sign a book for this girl but didn’t expect to be bombarded. This was the man who had gone to Man Ray seeking him as a mentor; wasn’t he dead? Not in my dream, I ran and ran but it took forever I was going to get my portfolio to show to him; but I finally gave up it was taking so long and I couldn’t seem to get there and so I returned but he was gone. I was scaling the side of the campus it was on a hill. There was some guy playing guitar underneath a big heavy press of some kind, he was good he was showing off, again I was waiting my turn and finally decided to split but as I jumped off a roof into wet grass I noticed people looking at us; their was a table and people making fun of the man who jumped off right before me – they where saying things about me and cracking up I also offered one final insult insinuating that perhaps he was also realizing that he was an unwanted pregnancy. So I said by to someone I new at the table and jumped off a wall with a sense of urgency I could have hit my head on the way down but I pushed off.

People looked at me and I looked into a room of a woman I knew and took some of her stuff in order to help her out and finally I was in a open top red Porsche and pulled up next to my own car, I was going to empty out her stuff but noticed a female police officer staring in my direction, I hadn’t noticed her before and then someone pulled up next to her and she became alarmed and pulled out her gun; I had been drinking and thought she might arrest me but this seemed more alarming as she shot this person but it seemed within reason somewhat as they where acting irrationally and seemed to have been attacking her or perhaps they where just trying to help me to escape? Suddenly Michele was with another woman and they where trying to get away but M was in no condition to do so she was drunk. There was an urgency that lady didn’t know how to get out of here, I knew that you just had to get over the hill so I did I climbed and climbed and suddenly realized that I had come upon someone slower then me, the leaves where wet I sprayed water so that when I passed they would be wet suddenly we where at the end and I got nervous and didn’t want to walk into the encampment I was going to walk up the steep hills and sneak around; so I backtracked and carefully jumped off the trail in order to not leave a sign and I went beneath a tree and up against an embankment.

They where looking for me, I don’t know why but they where and for a bit they couldn’t find me because I was pressed up against and under the embankment but it wouldn’t last I was literally beneath their feet. They found me and made it clear that I wasn’t going to get away and that they needed to talk to me – I was pushed into a market and this man intending to intimidate me lunged at me with a knife a few times motioning that I come with him and do what he says; for some reason I pulled out a gun and accidentally shot him in the side of the head but he didn’t even flinch he just got more mad and I suddenly realized what they might do to me and he was mad so I shot him again and killed him. The man that was ahead of me on the trail gave me a look that I was in a bad situation and I thought about what they might do to me; and I tried reasoning with him that that had been my only option and that I was going to run and that he should help me, I saw a bit of sympathy in his eyes as we exited the doorway, I was surrounded but there was a brief moment of confusion and so I thought about running and that I had a chance because of the woods but they all had guns. Then I woke up.