Wednesday, February 1, 2012

I think I get a little bit ahead of myself but it's fun trying to catch up

Last night I couldn't go to sleep and had a bowl of cereal (at 2 in the morning) and then, in the early morning, I woke up and fell back into a dream...I'd been driving around trying to find a good cup of coffee;)

I finally stopped and parked - walked up a short hill past a construction site enjoying the (somewhat) familiar (comforting?) sound of Brooklyn accents and trying to walk faster annoyed by the two ladies walking behind me talking incessantly.

I was driving again and finally found a place; I sat and drank one cup and then went to the counter to buy another and I ran into an old friend of mine studying for a math test.

[Just Remembered]

Earlier I was in a house with a bannister bed; someone like a "mother" figure was holding a contest of doing pull-ups on a pole hanging from the bed posts. I wanted to try too; when they went to sit by the window I tried and it was so effortless (pull ups can be difficult}.

This same room had a large sliding window and a deck right on the beach; it was a warm sunny day.
There was someone that I wanted to sit next too but I was shy. I sat with my back to the window kinda next to her, on the floor, trying not to be too obvious; she was turned slightly facing the sun. People were talking right in front of me but I closed my eyes. Then I felt the sensation of someone softly brushing the sand from my face and chest; and it kind of startled me at first but then I was so besides myself; (I couldn't do it justice trying to describe) I suppose its only that special kind of feeling you can have in a dream.

Back to the cafe and I was (helping out) working on math problems; it wasn't that difficult but it seemed frustrating and I was having a hard time concentrating. She got up and wandered off and so did I.

Then I started talking to a man with a beard, an older gentleman who, who seemed really wise but a bit crazed; we were still at the cafe. Then he started talking about his name and how he shares it with someone famous and that perhaps they could be related; there was a plaque on the wall with this famous person's name (kinda like at Mc Donalds).

He was suddenly wearing a tuxedo and my friend reappeared wearing the most extravagant yet simple dress imaginable. Imagine a flower you could wear that somehow would cooperate and become more of a dress than a flower. It took me a second to compose myself, It was so over-the-top beautiful I almost wanted to crack a joke to escape the shock I was in but I was so dumfounded I couldn't say anything; accept to greet her while trying not to stare so hard. I gave her a quick hello and a careful hug (because of her dress) but I didn't want to be rude, so I quickly finished my conversation with the older gentleman, it was nice talking to him and he seemed to be going to this same party.

Then this uneasy sensation hit me, I wasn't sure that I was even invited ; my clothes hadn't changed, I was wearing a jean jacket and jeans (what I'm wearing right now); and everyone seemed dressed up.

We left and I was still walking with my friend, she was nervous about going to the party because of her dress, I didn't say anything trying to reassure her; I was happy to still be walking with her; by her remarks she seemed to think i knew a lot about social decorum and going to parties; I still wasn't sure if I was actually going.


If you ever have a dream like this - don't play The Smiths / The Queen is Dead , first thing afterward; still sleepy slowly waking up drinking coffee.

This is how it goes down; I've had this tape in a radio by the kitchen for a few months, I forgot it was in there and so I rewound it and played it in its entirety...I'll usually skip around but it was a tape so I let it play.


I made a friend in NY, I think she is still a friend; she actually texted me one day to meet her at cemetery (where she would write and be crazy), an old one in the East Village; she was certifiably crazy but on a level where she functioned just enough to be a writer but also to annoy the hell out of of people; she was an alcoholic too; so I would have a beer with her in front of her place on St Marks and people watch and listen to her stories - if I ever couldn't understand the first time, she would end up repeating so it eventually all made sense; sometimes it was hard but I also found it more interesting than the usual bar banter right next door at the Grassroots Tavern (though I do miss those friends too, n-o-w I appreciate them). One night they ran into me talking to "my special friend" and they were kind of snobbish with the looks they were giving, wondering what I was up to. I noticed that she felt uneasy and felt sad when she told me that I should go with them. I eventually did and then I only saw her one more time. The last time, she and another friend, a recent graduate of The New School (he is very open minded and also a writer) wandered around drinking on the street (that night, they unknowingly saved me from a funk I was in). He (Andy) also appreciated her and could see past her outward persona. My dream of falling in love with a writer (weirdly) came true; but it also taught me to give up on any such litmus tests.

Andy at Mars Bar - through the skies for you...

Priors - What You Need (DCUP Remix)

MokonaEsMokona (1 month ago)

I can't stop pressing the replay button

[seriously, two days in a row, I'm not even paying attention to the lyrics; it's just so soothing..]


Post a Comment

Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]

<< Home